Performing Professor?
by ShotgunRedneck
Summary: Dumbledore in one of his greater moments decided to let one of the dear Professors Perform during the Halloween Feast. And our favorite snarky Potions Master is CHOSEN to be this year's Performing Professor! How will Hogwarts take this?
1. Chapter 1

Hello! This was just an idea I had and HAD to put it on paper. Is just something to entertain you all! XP Please read and review!~

_**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Harry Potter or Avenged Sevenfold...Please support the official release**_

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It was a normal dinner night at Hogwarts and Harry was thoroughly enjoying the treacle tart. Hermione was munching on some Key Lime Pie while Ron was hogging the Chocolate Pudding. And as they were finishing dessert, Professor Dumbledore stood up. He clapped his hands for attention and once he had everyone's attention the old man spoke. "I have a few announcements for you all! First off, this year, for the Halloween Feast you students get to dress up for it! Any costume is permitted, as long as it follows School Dress Code." He pointedly looked at Fred and George, who were pouting.

This announcement made whispers run through the Hall like wild fire. But before any rumors started going around, Dumbledore clapped his hands, regaining attention to himself. "And one more announcement before you trot go to bed." Here he brought a small cauldron filled with slips of parchment. "Also, on Halloween one of our dear professors shall perform for us! And once you are picked, no trading or getting out of it! So, without further adieu!" He pulled back the sleeve of his flamboyant robes and pulled out a slip of parchment.

And as he was unraveling it, Snape decided to take a sip of his wine. "And the Performing Professor is SEVERUS SNAPE!" Severus choked and spewed his wine. Hagrid thumped him on the back, helping clear this air way. Once Severus stopped coughing, he looked at Dumbledore. Shock and Horror flashing through his eyes. "Congratulations Professor! In three weeks you shall be performing in front of your students!" Nothing but silence filled the Hall. All were too shocked and disturbed at the fact that SNAPE had to perform. Harry looked away from the clearly insane man to his friends, "I now know that he is nutters."

Ron shook his head, "I don't know who to be more sorry for, us or Snape." Soon, after Dumbledore finished "congratulating" the still horrified Potions Master, the students went to their correct dormitories. Already tales of what Snape would do before and after the performance were forming...

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Harry knew that the end of the world was here. Why? Because it was 2 weeks after The Announcement and Snape took away points from Draco Malfoy. Yeah, the end of the world was here. Malfoy's jaw was hitting the floor. "T-Ten points? Whatever for?" Snape sneered, "For deciding to throw incorrect ingredients in Mr. Potter's potion. And if you say ANYTHING to your father Mr. Malfoy, then you will have detention from me for the rest of your school career."

Severus looked away from the gobsmacked Pure-blood to Harry. "And Mr. Potter. We shall redo this lesson Saturday. And 5 points from Gryffindor. For not watching your potion carefully." Harry, deciding not to anger him even more said, "Yes sir." And the bell rang to release them. Once the students got into the main portion of the castle, Ron looked at Harry with wide eyes. "The world is ending?"

Hermione walked by, singing "It's the end of the world as we know it." Harry smiled, "And I feel fine." Both Muggle raised children laughed, leaving a very confused Ron in their wake...

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_**END! I know short but it is going to be a SHORT story that got stuck in my head and thought to FINALLY put it on paper. I will add new chapters to my MAIN stories every Monday. JUST ONE chapter. In a random order via stories of course XP Review!**_

_**List of MAIN Stories:**_

_**Fake It**_

_**Dragons?**_

_**Sound Soul**_

_**Welcome to the Family**_

_**Blood is Thicker than Water**_

_**A New Tail**_

_**The Dogfather**_

_**The Legacy of War**_


	2. Chapter 2

Okay! Another Chapter! I hope you will like this!

_**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Harry Potter or AV7X...wish I did and please support the official release**_

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_**Halloween Night...**_

Harry stood in the Gryffindor Common Room, finishing up the last bits of his costume. He was being Freddy from his favorite Muggle horror film "A Nightmare on Elm Street" and was applying the spell to make it look like his face was burned/melting off. (Thank you Fred and George!) Hermione came down from the Girl's Dorm and she was being Belle from Disney's "Beauty and the Beast." It was something that Harry thought fit the girl well. Hermione was helping Fred and George finish up their costumes as she fiddled with the ribbon that held her hair back.

The Twins were being Dr. Seuss's Thing 1 and Thing 2 (which fit the Twins perfectly) and Ron was being Jason from another Muggle movie that Harry had heard of. He smiled and went over to his friends, pulling his hat in place. "Hey guys."

They turned to him and Hermione squeaked in fear while Ron muttered "Bloody hell mate!" The Twins were laughing at their expressions for the two other first years had no idea what Harry was being. The Boy-Who-Lived grinned before motioning to the Portrait Hole.

"We should get going. I am NOT missing Snape's performance." They all nodded and left Gryffindor Tower. Fred and George already had fiddled with a Muggle video camera and were going to use it to record Snape's performance. Hermione tried to talk the older Gryffindors out of it but they wouldn't budge. So now, they were just waiting for when it was time for their Professor to preform...

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Harry laughed as he entered the Great Hall with his friends, Malfoy (and the rest of the Slytherins) were staring at him. Most of the Purebloods were terrified already while some of the Muggle-borns kept laughing. A couple of Hufflepuffs had congratulated Harry on his choice of costume, and the first year had almost given poor Professor Quirell a heart attack when the man saw his face. Harry felt like nothing could go wrong as the Halloween Feast began...

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Dumbledore stood and clapped his hands, gaining everyone's attention. "Now, that the Feast has gone off to a grand start, it is time for our Performance by Professor Snape!"

If looks could kill then Dumbledore would be splattered all over the Hall. Severus stood from his seat, letting the students get a good glimpse of him for the first time that night. He was wearing a black form fitting sleeveless shirt, a black bandana with white tribal markings, tight fitting jeans and boots. On his wrists were spiked bracelets and Snape had his hair out of his face. All in all, he looked good. From what Harry could tell by the amount of female blushes and giggles that had erupted from the Hall. The green eyed boy looked over at the Twins, who had the camera ready.

He looked back to his professor to see that the man was now standing on the make-shift stage. He stood proudly and pulled out his wand. With a few strokes, a band of skeletons and instruments were on the now demonic stage. Severus himself grabbed a guitar and the moment he began playing, the skeletons came to life.

Harry grabbed his hat as music began blaring through the Hall. It was enough for everyone to feel it drum their rib cages and make the glass on the windows dance withing their frames.

**This shining city built of gold, a far cry from innocence,  
There's more than meets the eye round here, look to the waters of the deep.  
A city of evil.  
There sat a seven-headed beast, ten horns raised from his head.  
Symbolic woman sits on his throne, but hatred strips her and leaves her naked.  
The Beast and the Harlot.**

Dumbledore and the other Professors were shocked as they heard Severus belt out this music in front of their students.

**She's a dwelling place for demons.  
She's a cage for every unclean spirit,  
Every filthy bird and makes us drink  
The poisoned wine to fornicating with our kings.  
Fallen now is Babylon the Great.**

The students were shocked as the Potions Master began going into solo riffs on the guitar, which was amazing to watch. The Twins were glad they had their camera rolling.

**The city dressed in jewels and gold, fine linen, myrrh and pearls.  
Her place will come all at once as mourners watch her burn.  
Destroyed in an hour.  
Merchants and captains of the world, sailors, navigators too.  
Will weep and mourn this loss with her sins piled to the sky,  
The Beast and the Harlot**.

The students began to cheer and dance as their professor continued to play, most of them still shocked that Snape of all people could sing this well. The Weasley Twins knew that they were going to make big bucks off of the selling of this video.

**She's a dwelling place for demons.  
She's a cage for every unclean spirit,  
Every filthy bird and makes us drink  
The poisoned wine to fornicating with our kings.  
Fallen now is Babylon the Great.**

McGonagall looked point blank at Albus. "You set yourself up for this one Albus." She had to roar it at him over the volume of Snape's Performance.**  
**  
**The day has come for all us sinners.  
If you're not a servant, you'll be struck to the ground.  
Flee the burning, greedy city.  
****Looking' back on her to see there's nothing around.**

**I don't believe in fairytales and no one wants to go to hell.  
You've made the wrong decision and it's easy to see.  
Now if you wanna serve above or be a king below with us,  
You're welcome to the city where your future is set forever.**

**She's a dwelling place for demons.  
She's a cage for every unclean spirit,  
Every filthy bird and makes us drink  
The poisoned wine to fornicating with our kings.  
Fallen now is Babylon the Great. **

**She's a dwelling place for demons.  
She's a cage for every unclean spirit,  
Every filthy bird and makes us drink  
The poisoned wine to fornicating with our kings.  
Fallen now is Babylon the Great. **

Snape calmly stood from where he was crouched, banishing his band. With out a second thought or word, went back to the Head Table to resume his dinner. All of the students were unaware of the conversation going on in the back of their DADA mind. _'My Lord? Did you know Severus could sing?' __** 'I had no idea. Hmm. Perhaps we could use this but oh well, go release the troll.' **__'Yes my lord.'_ The stuttering man slipped from the room, knowing by dawn tomorrow his fellow co-worker will have a fan club for his music...

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_**End Chapter! Man that was fun to write X3 The epilogue will be next chapter! And the song Snape performed was "The Beast and the Harlot" by Avenged Sevenfold! One of the most AMAZING bands ever! REVIEW PLEASE!**_


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